Goodbye Forever
by KatyWood
Summary: Hermione makes a fatal decision in her 7th year at Hogwarts, a year after Voldemort has been defeated(disclaimer: All characters belong to JK Rowling)
1. Death of a Beloved

Goodbye Forever  
  
Hermione looked up from her diary. Her mind was made up. Lavender and Parvati had left for dinner and she was all alone in the dormitory. Everything was perfect. Now if only she could muster up enough courage. She went to look in the mirror, it seemed to take forever as she dragged herself to it.  
"Child! What in the world? You have to clean yourself up! Fix that HAIR!!"  
"Shut up you old hag!" Hermione didn't expect an answer but she could see what the mirror meant. Her cheeks were tear streaked, her hair was sticking out from all over and it was greasy because she hadn't taken a shower in three days. She did this so everyone would avoid her but it turned out no one cared because they all thought that she was stressing about the NEWT's. She just needed to be alone.   
She went into the bathroom that she shared with Lavender and Parvati. She turned the shower on. If she was going to do this she was at least going to be clean. She went to her trunk and took out her black dressy cloak. She had bought it a day ago at Hogsmeade. They were used for very elegant bridesmaids. She used all of the money that she had saved up for going on a trip to America. About £100 She had exchanged it for Galleons and such at Gringott's but she didn't care. She didn't need to go to New York. This was more important. She took out a black peasant shirt and a black school skirt. Then she took out her knee high leather black boots that Ron loved so much.  
She laid these things on the bed and she started to cry again. She trudged into the bathroom and undressed. She got in slowly making sure the water was warm. She put on her Harry's favorite shampoo. The one that smelled like green apple. She tried to hurry but there was no rush. She knew that Lavender and Parvati were going to go and visit with Seamus and Dean in the Forbidden Forest as a date. Ron and Harry would think she was studying. She got as clean as she could in half and hour. Got out and dried herself up. Their was a long mirror in which she could see all of herself in the bathroom. She dropped the towel.  
"No wonder, I'm so ugly! The only person who's ever looked twice at me is Neville. Oh yeah and Viktor but he's dead." She said this to herself although she was thinking that she wish she had Ron's attention like she had Neville's but she didn't dare ask him out again. It was too humiliating in 5th year and it would definitely not go over with him now. She longed to kiss him but he thought of her as his sister. Harry never loved her either but that didn't matter now. She didn't want to start crying again now that her face was finally clean. Especially this naked.  
She walked into her room and took out her wand. She magicked a lock on the dormitory door. Just then Hedwig came to sit on her dormitory window. Just in time. Hermione put on that lotion that Ron liked, the one she got a Muggle shop called Victoria's Secret. It was called Endless Love. She put on her clothes. Even her underwear was black. She put on the cloak but did not tie it. She put on the boots and took out the quill that she had used for her letters. She took out six pieces of parchment.   
On the first she wrote:  
  
Dear Mum and Dad,  
I know that what I'm going to do is stupid but you don't understand, No one understands. Do not blame yourselves, or Ron or Harry. It is neither of their faults. I have failed you, Ron, Harry, Dumbledore, and myself. I didn't know what else to do. I am so sorry. I was tired of being myself and this is my only way. I know that I'm being a coward and I agree but that is me. I don't want to try and live up to everyone's expectations! Or even mine. I love you so much. I am so sorry. I know this is selfish, but I couldn't think of anything else. I love you, I love you, I love you!!! Please keep my room as it is, but first I want you to look under my pillow. I love you.  
Goodbye Forever.  
Your daughter,  
Hermione  
She folded up the letter and let her tears fall on it as she wrote the address and another owl flew in. Then another and another, now their were four. One of them was an Eagle owl which belonged to her next recipient. Then she took out the next piece of parchment out. This was to Draco Malfoy.  
  
Dear Draco,  
I am gonna give you what you have always wanted.. It looks like Mudblood Granger won't be around to ruin your days any longer. I'm sorry about your father and how he died. I am sorry for all the pain that I caused you. I know this will sound weird and unexpected but after Voldemort was defeated in our sixth year, I realized how much I actually cared about you. I would've wanted to be your friend but I guess even after your father's death you didn't want to have to deal with MY KIND even though you protected and spied for us. I'm sorry you felt that way. I love you, Draco.  
Goodbye Forever.  
Love,  
Hermione  
  
As she got ready to write another, another owl flew in. It was Pigwidgeon. Pig was so funny, he didn't seem that he understood, neither did the other owls but Pig looked at her strangely. She took out the next piece of parchment. This was to Dumbledore and the whole school.  
  
Dear Professor Dumbledore, Staff and Students of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry,  
I am sorry to disappoint everyone. I am sorry. I love every single one of you. To Professor McGonagall- You are my mentor. You have inspired me to do so much! All of your teaching did not go to waste, it will always be carried in my heart. To Hagrid- I loved everything about you. You were caring and energetic. So sentimental. I loved your love for animals. You will always be loved by every one. To Professor Sprout- my favorite thing in your class other than how much it built me up for potions was getting to know such a quaint and humble person as yourself. I also learned many things from you. Keep Neville in mind for any hands on things you have to do. To Professor Snape- as much as it seemed that I hated you I did not. I have always felt so much gratitude towards you. Every one is lucky to have you in their life. I learned so much from you as well. You will never be forgotten in Hogwarts, A History or in the Wizarding Worlds History. You were such a key part in everything that happened last year. I love you. Professor Lupin- Defense Against the Dark Arts was never so much fun. You are the most open teacher and such a great friend to Harry Ron and I. Also Sirius. To Professor Black- Take care of Harry like Mr and Mrs, Potter wanted you to. You are great as the ass. Defense Against the Dark Arts. Watch out Professor Lupin! To every one else I have not mentioned and to the students I love you all. I know that this was the best way to go. I love you all!  
Goodbye Forever.  
Love,  
Hermione  
  
She looked it over and realized as she cried a little harder that it sounded more like a Valedictorian or Most Magical Student in Seven(Hogwart's sort of Valedictorian)speech. She was already chosen as the MMSIS but she couldn't face any one. She took out another piece of parchment. Before she started to write in it she took out a different kind of ink. It was dark blue instead of black. She didn't want to seem that morbid. She took out her Vanilla body spray that was running out, she used that the most. She sprayed it on the paper and sniffed it. She sprayed it again. Finally she took out the quill and dipped into the ink. This is was for Harry. Oh how he loved that smell. He told her so the day they defeated Voldemort and he hugged her, crying.  
  
Dearest Harry,  
I am so sorry that I will cause you this pain, but you don't know what it is like to be me. You and Ginny are like the brother and sister I never had. Don't tell her I told you that. I have been called a Mudblood. At first that didn't bother me but then it became all of me. I WAS my label, I had BECOME my label. I wish that I didn't feel like there was something I missed and I gave it all away just to have something to hold on to but I couldn't control myself. Take care of yourself and Ron. Take care of Ginny, she loves you so much. She is in love with you, and I have noticed that you have been looking at her differently. Tell Sirius the following:   
Dear Sirius,   
take care of Harry and don't let him mess up too much(LOL) but any way, take care of Drusilla. I know that she loves you very much, and I think that Mrs. Drusilla Black has great news for you! Hmm, I wonder what it could be???  
Back to Harry:  
Please take care of yourself. You are worth so much more than me, I know I won't be missed all that much, I mean I'm not being missed now right? Right. I love you Harry, you were my best friend. You and Ron. I love you.  
Goodbye Forever.  
Your friend forever,  
Hermione  
  
Hermione read this over and wiped her tears before they messed up her face. Before she did it she would wash her face and put on the make up that Ginny had given her for her fifth year Christmas present. She remembered since her fifth year and Ginny's fourth they had become best girl friends. The four of them now did things together. She took out the rainbow ink she had gotten on her birthday by Ginny and dipped her quill in it. She began to write.  
  
Dearest Ginny,  
I don't know what to say except you are my best girl friend, oh screw that, you ARE my best friend, You were the only person I could confide in with my "boy" problems. When I needed help getting over Ron you helped me so much more than I would've thought. You should be a therapist of some sort. You always listened and gave the right advice. Take my advice for a change and BE with Harry. I'm sure he loves you. I've seen the way he looks at you. The way I looked at Ron since our fifth year. I know that in your first year you thought you messed things up between you and Harry, but if anything I think that he valued you more. I know that this will seem abrupt, but it isn't. I have been moping around for too long. I think its time I gave my depression and myself a permanent rest. How morbid is that? I know but it's the truth. I am so tired of this phony life I live. You and Harry will make beautiful babies. I'm just playing, or am I? Ok well I have so much more to say but I can't quite put it into words. I love you Ginny. You are the sister(or brother for that matter!)that I never had.   
Goodbye Forever.  
Love your sister in spirit,  
Hermione  
  
Then she took out the red ink. Before she wrote this last one she rolled the others up and tied with ribbons she once used in her hair. She took out the black head band that she had worn so many school days and put it on. She fixed her hair so that it was still curly, but they were ringlets and they weren't frizzy. Then she sat down at the desk she had so often used to write in her journal. She took her journal out, wrapped in brown paper, put Ron, Harry and Ginny's name on it and kissed it as tears dropped on it. She unrolled the empty piece of parchment and began to write. She audibly wept and wept.  
  
My dearest Ron,  
I sometimes wonder why I never gave up on you. I am still wondering why. You were never anything but a good friend to me, and yet I couldn't keep thinking that. When you thought I was joking in fifth year, I took it to the heart I shouldn't have, but I did. It isn't your fault you didn't know I was serious, I mean we had been friends for so long, I thought maybe it was best. We would most likely be better friends any way, right? Right! Thank you for my birthday present this year. All those sugar quills and chocolate frogs came in handy. No, I haven't eaten them all, they are under my bed if you would like them. You were my savior, my hero, my best friend. I love you both as a friend and more. Please don't feel the cause of this. It wasn't your fault I love you. This was only part of the pain. Again, I want to say that I love you.  
Goodbye Forever.  
Your loving friend,  
Hermione  
  
At last, all of the letters were done. She put make up on gently and carefully. She did it naturally. She rechecked herself in the mirror and let out a tear when the mirror complimented her. She tied the parchment on to Hedwig along with Ron and Harry's letters. She tied Ginny's letter to Pig, Draco's letter to his eagle owl, her parent's letter to one of the school owls, and Dumbledore's letter to the other school owl's. She kissed Hedwig and Pig goodbye and told them to deliver it as quickly as possible. She laid on her bed, took out her wand and magicked the lock away. She prayed to God to forgive her and slowly raised her wand.  
"AVADA KEDAVRA!!!" she yelled through weeping, a green light shown and downstairs every one stopped moving as they heard a distant shriek in pain.  
Everyone looked around and just went right on studying for their NEWT's and OWL's. The others were downstairs in the castle grounds because they were younger and finals were over for them. Then Hedwig and Pig came in through the windows. Ron, Harry and Ginny were sitting together, studying. They turned their heads towards the two owls and grabbed the letters and Ron grabbed the package. He opened it as Ginny and Harry stared.  
He read aloud, "My Journal." He turned red and then looked up at the confused expressions. "This is Hermione's. I wonder why she gave this to us. Let's open our letters."  
~~**~~**~~  
"Draco, isn't that your owl?" Snape looked down at Malfoy and walked out of the common room. There were only a few Slytherins left after Voldemort's defeat and Snape had just come to say that Goyle had been captured. Pansy eyed him curiously. He went to his owl, gave him a treat and grabbed the letter.  
~~**~~**~~  
"Mr. Granger, Mrs. Granger, a letter has arrived for you." Mrs. Granger got up and took the yellow parchment envelope from their new dental assistant Roger who was looking oddly at the envelope.   
"Oh its from Hermione dear! We haven't heard from her in TWO weeks! What a relief, I thought she had forgotten about us." She handed the envelope to her husband who started to open it.  
~~**~~**~~  
"Here you go Fawkes. Oh why don't you just hurry up and die again?" Professor Dumbledore was feeding Fawkes when a school owl came in. It had an envelope. Dumbledore grabbed it and started to open it.  
~~**~~**~~  
Ron looked up from is letter confused and with a bewildered expression on his face. "Hermione? She couldn't have-I mean she, wait the scream, NO!!!" Ron yelled as he started up the dormitory stairs. He ran into Hermione's room, he didn't even notice Ginny and Harry yelling behind him.  
"HERMIONE!!! NO!!!" He knelt behind her bed and touched her face. He started to cry. "No, Hermione, oh Hermione, Hermione, Hermione, why, why, WHY?!?!?"  
"Ron! Calm down!" Ginny's voice came. "Here let me see, she can't be--"  
"CALM DOWN??? HOW can I CALM DOWN when my BEST FRIEND is lying here DEAD!! Do you understand? DEAD!!!"  
Harry went over to feel her pulse but it was no use, there was none. "Oh Hermione, how could you? HOW COULD YOU??" He hit one of the four posters and glared at himself in Hermione's mirror. "Get someone Ron."  
"No! I'm staying here with her."  
"Oh one of you go–please I can't bear to leave her side!"Ginny said in between sobs.  
"No need, I'm here," Dumbledore glided from the door to Hermione's bed. "Oh no. This has never happened before. I–don't know–," Harry put a hand on his shoulder. It was so unlike Dumbledore to not have anything to say. His eyes were tearing up but before he could cry he stood up. He was Ron's same height so he was able to look into his eyes and he could see that his pain was the same if not worse than the others. "Mr. Potter, Ms. Weasley, please follow me. We need to alert a few people."   
Ron was alone with Hermione for the first time in weeks. He didn't want this to be real, but the harsh reality finally hit him when he kissed her and she didn't wake up. He picked up her hand, kissed it and then just let it drop. "No, not you, Hermione, any one but you." He wept and cried for what seemed forever when he finally got the courage to leave, but just for a moment. He had to get out. He went back to his room, quietly so people would think he still wanted to be alone with Hermione. He sat on his bed and reached for his bureau door. He opened quietly so that no one would hear him and got out a little ring box. He opened it and closed it seeing that it was not empty. He crept back to the room.   
"Hermione? I know that you can't possibly hear me but if there is a slight chance that you ARE still–alive, then I want you to know that I was being immature in our fifth year. I love you Hermione and so here–," he grabbed her hand and slipped on an engagement ring. It was platinum and had just one small diamond. "I saved up since last year, I even got a job over the summer. I love you, I love you, I LOVE YOU!!!" He screamed in between sobs. Then Dumbledore came in and put a hand on Ron's shoulder. That scared Ron and he flinched. "Get off of me! Leave me alone!!" 


	2. Reactions to Death

Part II (A/N:- It has taken me a long time to write this thing so please review it, I am more of a poet so if its not as good as the chap.. before sorry.)  
  
"Ron it wasn't your fault. She knew you loved her. Don't beat yourself up. It was her decision, please calm down."  
"I am SO SICK of people telling me to calm down! How CAN I CALM DOWN?? Is it just me or does no one else REALIZE THIS!?!"  
"Realize what, Mr. Weasley?"  
"Realize that I KILLED MY BEST FRIEND!!"  
"Mr. Weasley, you did not in any way cause her death. She took that on upon herself."  
"I am SO tired of this! SHE DID IT BECAUSE OF ME!" Ron was turning very red and was breathing heavily. "SHE loved ME! SHE thought that I DIDN'T love HER! WHY CAN'T YOU SEE THAT?" Ron said shoving Dumbledore then falling to his knees sobbing and weeping. He grabbed Dumbledore around the middle and buried his face in his stomach while saying, still in between sobs, "Why can't you FUCKING see that?"  
"Ron. I know how you feel. Please stand up." Dumbledore helped Ron up and took out a handkerchief out of his pocket. "Here. I'll send in Harry for you and him to talk. Remember, no one could have known about this. It seems it was carefully planned. She loved you Ron, yes that is true. Yes, she thought her love was unrequited. But remember this Ron, you did not say, 'Hermione, I don't love you like that, I know that you feel horrible and want to die but what can I say?' or did you? No? That is what I thought. She chose to do this on her own. Just like she made an assumption on her own. I will call Harry in now. Remember it wasn't you. Just remember that." Dumbledore walked out and in walked Harry. Red in the face and tear streaked. As soon as he sat next to Ron on the bed. They hugged each other(in a manly way of course) and cried until finally Ron pulled away.  
"Harry, it was all my fault. She is here dead because of me. Look at her Harry. She isn't breathing. She doesn't have a heartbeat. All because I didn't tell her how much I cared about her in time. She needed me to love her and I did but it was too late for me to tell her. I was going to ask her at graduation. Now she won't even be able to attend because of me, Harry. Because of ME!!"  
"No it wasn't any one's fault, Ron. If any one's it was everyone's fault for not seeing how in pain she was."  
"Lets go downstairs. I can't be in here any more."  
"Yeah, me neither." Together they walked down to the common room which now contained a lot of crying and weeping souls.  
  
  
~~**~~**~~  
"Who is that from?" Pansy said walking over to Draco.   
"Now tell me Parkinson, how in the world does this concern you?" Draco said heading out of the common room and up to the library with Pansy trailing right behind him.  
"It concerns me because you concern me. Draco, wait!" She grabbed his arm and he whirled around and threw her hand off of him.  
"Never touch me again dirty, Death-Eater shit. You're lucky I haven't turned you and your folks in. The only reason I haven't turned your ass in is only 'cause I'm tired of being a FUCKING snitch. Now if you don't leave me alone, I'm gonna make sure they fucking torture you. Got it?"  
"Yeah, whatever, traitor. I'm sorry I ever thought you could come back again." Pansy said narrowing her eyes and crossing her arms.  
"Come back to WHAT??? To you and your mother fucking 'clan?' I don't think so. What will I gain through that? Life in Azkaban? I think you must be fucking mistaking me for that bitch you call a father."  
"Oh, that is IT! Look, if you don't come back Malfoy, you'll regret it. I know what happened between you and YOUR parents. Your dad's dead and your mom wants nothing to do with you. She kicked you out. I saw it all. I thought she had lost her mind. But don't worry, you'll be together again... in hell. You and your mom will definitely be the first to die when– " Pansy quickly covered her mouth.  
"When what?" Draco took out his wand and pointed it at her heart and said, "when what? Tell me Parkinson, or you will fucking regret it."  
"When Harrow takes over that's when. That's all I know. I'm sure your mother knows Harrow. Oh yeah he definitely knows her. I'm sure you know how he knows her, and how he knows every other traitor's mom or wife or girlfriend."  
"Harrow? The fucking rapist? The guy who raped my mom? Wait a minute he's planning something?"   
"Yeah and you're first on his list so I suggest you watch it."   
"Are you serious?"  
"Why wouldn't I be?" Then Draco smirked widely. "What the heck are you smiling at? I wouldn't be smiling if I were you. That's for sure."  
"At this: STUPEFY!" Pansy dropped to the floor and Draco raised his wand again. "Mobiliarbus. Oh but first I have to read this, sorry Parkinson but your dose of Veritaserum will just have to wait." He unfolded the letter and read it carefully. "Hermione? But she can't be... it isn't possible. C'mon Parkinson, I'm taking you to Snape." With that he took off running, Pansy floating right behind him. But when he got to Snape's office it was empty, so then he ran the opposite way to Professor McGonagall's office. Finally he reached it and there was a note on the door that said she was in Dumbledore's office. Then he took off at an even faster run finally reaching Dumbledore's office. "Cat Weazle."  
  
"Isn't there anything that we can do?" Snape demanded of Professor Dumbledore.  
"Yes, Mr. Malfoy? Can we help you with something?" Dumbledore couldn't even look Snape in the eyes. There was nothing they could do, so he was very thankful that Draco should come at such an opportune time.   
"Yes, sir. Two things actually. One, I have information about another Dark Lord that could be preparing to rise and then secondly what does this letter mean? Where is Hermione?" Draco said dragging Pansy inside the room and holding the letter up.  
"Firstly, that is some serious business that will just have to wait and you will understand once I answer the second question." Professor Dumbledore motioned for him to sit down and Draco sat down in between all of the teachers. "Mr. Malfoy, I don't know if you understood the letter or not but let me inform you that there has been a great tragedy in our school."  
"Did Hermione do something stupid? I mean she isn't, uh, dead is she? She didn't kill herself did she? That's what it sounded like in the letter." Draco said shaking his knee absentmindedly and tapping his fingers on his other knee.  
"Unfortunately, yes what you have just asked of me is true. If you want to go and see her, she is still in her dormitory. I believe Ron and Harry need all the support they can get. As does Ms. Weasley. The password is once again Caput Draconis."  
Draco didn't even have enough time to think. He started to run again until he reached the portrait of the Fat Lady.   
"Caput Draconis." The Fat Lady which held a tissue and was sobbing opened the door slowly so Draco had to push it open. Every one looked up at him and he looked around looking for Ron and Harry. The only person that came running to him was Neville.   
"What the hell are you doing here?" Neville said glaring up at Draco with tears in his eyes.  
"I came to see Harry, Ron and Ginny and uh Hermione." Draco said trying to hold back tears. It seemed the hardest thing he had ever had to do, even though he had done that a million times.   
"Since when have you been concerned with a Mudblood, Malfoy?" Neville sneered in tears. "You don't even care about your own friends." Draco just pushed him and went to Dean Thomas who was nearest.  
"Where's the girl's dormitory, please, you have to help me."  
"And why should I? All those times you– "  
"I don't know any way to apologize but I promise you I HAVE changed."  
"What's going on? Why is Malfoy in here?" came Ron's voice. "What do you want?"  
"I came to see if you were alright. All of you, are you ok?"  
"Ok? You have the balls to ask us if we're ok?"  
"Well, yeah, I mean I loved her, not in a girlfriend sort of way, but she loved me too."  
"How are you so sure? I mean actually how did YOU find out? I thought only Gryffindor's and teachers knew?"  
"Because of this." Draco showed him the letter. "I went to Dumbledore with information and to ask about that letter." Draco couldn't keep it in anymore. He had to cry a little. But what came out was not only a couple of tears. Draco broke down and wept. "I loved her, Ron, I loved her, Harry. I can't take this I have to see her." He stood up and hugged Ron and Ron began to cry again. Then he hugged Harry who was already crying. Then he ran to Ginny and she was weeping into his shoulder for what seemed like forever. Finally she took his hand and led him up to the dormitory. She motioned for Harry and Ron to stay downstairs as she continued up stairs with Draco. Neither of them talking. Finally they reached Hermione's dormitory which had a big HG engraved in the door.   
"You know she always loved this door?"  
"Why– is– that?" Draco said sniffling.  
"Not only does it mean Head Girl but also Hermione Granger. You know? Once she told me that it should be changed to MB."  
"What does– that– stand for?"  
"What do you think? Mudblood of course."  
"I'm sorry."  
"Don't apologize to me. Apologize to her." Ginny opened the door. "I'll leave you alone. When you come back downstairs, if you need to talk, I'm here, ok?"  
"Thanks."  
"Your welcome." She softly pecked him on the cheek and ran downstairs.  
~~**~~**~~  
"I wonder what news she has for us?" said Mrs. Granger reaching for a tea bag.  
"Here I'll read it aloud:  
Dear Mum and Dad,  
I know that what I'm going to do is stupid but you don't understand, No one understands. Do not blame yourselves, or Ron or Harry. It is neither of your faults. I have failed you, Ron, Harry, Dumbledore, and myself. I didn't know what else to do. I am so sorry. I was tired of being myself and this is my only way. I know that I'm being a coward and I agree but that is me. I don't want to try and live up to everyone's expectations! Or even mine. I love you so much. I am so sorry. I know this is selfish, but I couldn't think of anything else. I love you, I love you, I love you!!! Please keep my room as it is, but first I want you to look under my pillow. I love you.  
Goodbye Forever.  
Your daughter..."  
"Hermione?"  
"We have to go home now. I won't believe this is true until we see what's under her pillow." They both ran out of the office while yelling over their shoulder to Roger and telling him to cancel the rest of their appointments.   
Finally they reached the house and raced up the stairs to her room. They didn't touch anything because of her request. Mr. Granger threw the pillow off of her bed and started to cry as he picked up what was under it. He showed it to Mrs. Granger and she began to weep uncontrollably. They just held each other until they were hugging and on their knees.   
"Why,– why did she– have– to– do this– to–us?" Mrs. Granger said hardly able to breathe. Finally they walked out of the room.  
"What should we do with this?" Mr. Granger asked to no one in particular when another owl flew in. Inside was another letter explaining that what happened was in fact true. Professor Dumbledore had written to them and told them to take the train on Platform 9 3/4 in an hour in order to bring them to Hogwarts.   
"Well lets go." Mr. Granger said as he came down the stairs with two suitcases. One for him and his wife and the other full of Hermione's things. Pictures, letters they had received while she was at Hogwart's and her books. Her favorite books as a child. This was his way of coping. To take all of her things to her.   
He put the suitcases near the door, then he opened it. He lugged the suitcases in the trunk of the car and walked quickly to the house and stood in the doorway. "What are you doing honey?"  
"Just putting things the way they should be." She said as she set a frame down.  
"Well lets go sweety we'll be late."  
"Ok." They both walked out the door. Mrs. Granger looked back before closing the door at the magicked picture of her and her husband hugging Hermione who was in the middle, waving back and blowing kisses.  
  
  
A/N: Review please! Tell me if you think Draco should curse more or less. Just tell me what you think and what you would like to see and I'll take everything into consideration!  
Thanx a bunch! 


	3. Only One

Part III: Only One   
  
"Oh Hermione, how could you? I didn't mean to make you so, so, so, well, I don't know, so sad? I really didn't mind you at all, it was just in my blood, well my old blood." Draco took her small, pale, and white, limp hand in his. "Blood didn't matter to me, I was just following the stupid orders that Lucius told me to do, please, don't be dead. I didn't mean to. I didn't mean to. I didn't mean to." He cried and cried and couldn't seem to stop, until something surprised him. He felt a heavy hand on his shoulder and looked up to see that it was Harry. The tears quickly stopped.  
"Come on, Ma– I mean, D-Draco, dinner's ready, you best be coming down, plus Hermione's parents are here already."  
"Thanks for telling me."  
"Uh, Draco?"  
"What?" Draco said getting up from his knees, as Harry sat down. He wobbled a little because his knees hurt from kneeling for so long.  
"Why do you care so much? I mean come on, you never treated her with respect unless well, sorry to say, but unless you had to when we were in battle. I mean, why all the sudden the tears and the hurt and everything, when you never seemed to care?"  
"I never seemed to but I did Harry. I was– I don't– I mean I don't really know any more. I feel so bad that I treated her the way I did, and well, I'll be bloody damned if I don't see a way that I can bring her back, just to– just to– well, apologize." He said finally standing up strait. He headed for the door and motioned for Harry. "Come on, people will wonder. Maybe they'll think we're finally friends." He smirked, shook his head and walked away with Harry trailing behind him.  
~~**~~**~~  
  
"Oh Ron, don't blame this on yourself, how could you have known? You had a plan and it was perfect, she's the one who couldn't see that."  
"Don't you see, if I had told her this would have not happened. Me being stupid again, killed her, for real this time. I can't deal with the hurt unless I blame somebody, and I blame myself because it was my own stupidity that made her kill herself! I can't a won't ever live this day and this pain down. Ginny, I mean, how would you feel if lets say Harry killed himself because he thought you didn't love him back?"  
"I know I would be devastated Ron, but what good would it do to blame myself if he, I mean she, made it obvious that it wasn't the only reason. Ron, you know everything about Hermione now right?"  
"Well, yeah. I suppose."  
"Didn't you before?" This left Ron thinking. He got up and out of the common room and headed to the Quidditch pitch.  
~~**~~**~~  
  
"Mr. and Mrs. Granger. I am sorry. You can go up and see her but please have something to eat first." Dumbledore looked at them with the utmost heartache and sadness, that they could not refuse. They sat down but could not even look at their food.   
  
Moments later Ginny walked in with a pale, tear-streaked face. She shook Mr. Granger's hand and kissed Mrs. Granger on the forehead as she whispered, "I'm sorry."  
  
Then, Draco came in and shook their hands but couldn't stay in the great hall. He walked out as soon as he was done saying his words and bumped into Harry. They looked into each other's red eyes, nodded, and continued on their ways. Harry walked in and hugged them. He sat down next to Ginny and took his hand in hers. He noticed that it was even colder than Hermione's hand. It was also more pale. He had never touched anything so cold. He looked up at her. She was shaking all over.   
"Ginny? Are you ok?" Harry asked putting his right arm over her shoulder not letting his other hand let go of hers. She shook her head no. She leaned her head on his shoulder and he shuddered under her. He was all of the sudden very frightened. He lifted her up and they walked out of the great hall. Every one just stared after them.   
"Ginny what's wrong?" Harry asked placing her on the couch. He had taken her to the common room. She was shivering uncontrollably now.   
"I— don't..." She couldn't even finish her sentence. She passed out and he couldn't understand why.   
"ENNERVATE!!" He shouted. He didn't want her to die, so if she was still alive she had to respond to something so he had said the first thing that had come to his mind. She stirred and opened her eyes. He was almost already in tears.  
"H— Harry, why are you crying?" She said sitting up.  
"I— thought— I thought I had lost you too." He just embraced her and kissed her forehead and squeezed her harder.   
"Oh Harry. I am not going to die. Why would you think that?" Ginny said without breath. She was very confused, she wondered why he was so happy to see her.   
"I thought you– but– didn't you just faint?" Harry asked letting her go but looking into her eyes.  
"I did? Why?"  
"That's the thing. I don't know. I was hoping to ask you that."  
"What do you mean?"  
"Well, you started convulsing and you were pale. You looked, well, you looked dead. I thought that maybe you had been poisoned, since we still don't know how– um– well, how Hermione died. What was going on? What did you do?"  
"I don't really remember." Ginny said scratching her head. "I remember seeing black boots, knee high, and I remember seeing the tip of a wand and green light and then nothing just fog. Only fog, more and more fog." She got up and looked down at Harry with a confused expression. "It's as if I wasn't in control. Like I wasn't myself. It wasn't my voice that I can hear in the distance. What do you think this means?"  
"I don't know. I think we need to take you to Madam Pomfrey. You still seem a little weak. I'll get Dumbledore while she's checking you."  
"Ok. Let's go."  
~~**~~**~~  
  
"When can we see her?"  
"When she's been observe, Mrs. Granger."  
"How much do you know? What do you know for certain?"  
"We know that it was intentional and that most likely it was done with her wand."  
"Is that all?"  
"Mrs. Granger, I think it best if you remain calm for the time being. Please maybe it is best that you eat. You will need your strength."  
"Yes, honey, please sit down. At least have some coffee," Mr. Granger interrupted in agreement with Dumbledore. "Mr. Dumbledore, sir? How long will the observations exactly take. I know that we should be patient, and I am, sir, but just to be certain."  
"They started only a half hour ago. It should be very short." And as if on cue, Hedwig landed on the table, around her small leg were the results of the observation. "Here let me see." Dumbledore untied the small piece of parchment. He read it carefully. With a big sigh, he reported the news. " There seems to be green residue on her clothes which means one of the Unforgivables. Seeing as to how it was green, it was most likely the Killing Curse. Oh if only. Mrs. Granger, If you would like to see your daughter you can."  
~~**~~**~~  
  
At first he didn't know why he was headed that way, until he climbed the stairs to the place where he and Hermione had sat down together to cheer Harry on for the first three years of school until the three of them and Ginny were flying together. Harry Potter was the seeker, Hermione, Ginny, and Dean Thomas were the chasers. The beaters were Seamus and Neville. The captain and Keeper was Ron. He remembered the championship this year, they had won the Quidditch cup twice and most likely this year they had won the house cup as well. He realized that the place where he was standing was the place where he had first fallen in love with her. At the fist Quidditch game Harry had. He had amazed her with her actions. She had made Snape's cloak catch on fire. They had eventually figured out that it was not Snape and that it was actually Quirrel, but that just added to the memory.  
Ron didn't care about what was going to happen at this moment. All he knew was that he had to find some way to honor her and everything she had done. He left the stands. He went into the locker room and got his Nimbus 2002, the one that he had gotten as a present from Hermione. He had no idea how she had gotten the money but she had. He kicked off from the ground and flew around. He felt overwhelmed with emotion but wanted to control it. Realizing he didn't have full control, he let a tear fall.   
  
Only one.  
  
  
(A/N: R/R Please! Tell me what you think. If you have any suggestions please feel free to suggest. Sorry that it took so long but I had writers block. Thanx! BTW! Thanks to those who have reviewed!) 


	4. I Can't Take It!!

Part IV: I Can't Take It!!  
  
She looked back at him and her eyes were bloodshot, her skin was a sick green color and her fingers were black. She had spider webs in her hair and there were maggots falling from underneath her skirt and they were all filled with blood. There was blood dripping from her forehead and the tips of her fingers not to mention on her legs. The skin on her face was sagging. She pulled her wand out, as she did so she shook violently with every movement. Finally she raised it. The wood was rotting and there were spiders coming out from underneath the arms of her robes.   
"Ron!" She pointed the wand at him and he just stood there stunned. "You'll pay for doing this to me! You never loved me!! You should have!! You were too selfish!! Now look at me!! Do you see what you did to me?? You killed me!!" Her voice sounded horse and it was deeper than her usual voice. Every time she spoke, moths and spit would come out of her mouth. Then she coughed violently and that brought her to her knees. Blood started to come out of her mouth. "Now you will pay, Ron!! You will pay for what you did to me!" Hermione bowed her head and kept her icy, blood shot eyes on him and with all her might yelled, "CRUCIO!!"   
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!" Ron woke up suddenly with pain all over his body and a cold sweat. He looked at his watch and noticed that it was very bright. It said 12:00. But he had already seen this time. He didn't go to sleep until 6 that morning which means that it was 12 noon. He looked around and no one was in there. He thought to himself, 'Maybe it was all a dream. Maybe Hermione isn't dead.'   
He got up and started to take a shower. He was scrubbing himself slowly, just thinking about everything when he realized that he was soar. Why would he be soar if what he had just had was a dream? He had been scrubbing the same place on his stomach for about five minutes now, when he took the sponge off and washed off the bubbles, he could see a little star shaped cut that was still raw. From that you could clearly see the veins surrounding it. His eyes widened and he quickly got out and got dressed. Once he had his shoes on he ran downstairs only to find Draco, Ginny, and Harry talking. They looked up, they all had blood shot eyes and for a moment Ron thought he was still dreaming because Ginny's skin had that kind of green skin tone. His eyes widened but saw the confused expressions on their faces and decided it wasn't a dream. Which meant that Hermione was not with them any more, and that took all other thoughts away from his head.  
"Hey," he said in a lazy whisper to all of them as he sat down next to Draco. He was facing Harry and Ginny was facing Draco. None of them were wearing their school robes. They had been given the day off. It was Friday now so they wouldn't have classes until Monday.   
"Hey," they all said together.   
"Ginny, what's wrong?" Ron asked taking her hand and shivering at her cold touch.  
"N-nothing. I'm just a little cold is all. I was about t-to ask y-you the s-same thing." She said gasping for air and clinging on to Harry. He just kissed her head and rubbed her arm.  
"What do you mean?" Ron asked getting a slight pain in his body. "Ah." He clenched his teeth and dropped to the floor as the pain became stronger. He clung to his stomach and rolled over. When he looked at his hand it was full of blood. His eyes widened and he looked up to only see a blur and then just darkness and fog. Only fog. Fog, just fog.   
"Ron!" Ginny forgot about everything and just held her brother for what seemed like forever as Draco ran to get help. Dumbledore ran in and looked down at Ron and Ginny. His stomach was bleeding and he was twitching and moaning uncontrollably. Sort of like he was not conscious but still felt pain. And that was the exact problem.   
"We have to get him to the hospital wing. Immediately." Dumbledore sounded so far away like he was hearing him while underwater. All he could think about was the pain and his inability to scream or talk. He felt like he was drowning, not necessarily from lack of air but the tumultuous pain. "Mobiliarbus." He floated up into the air. Dumbledore walked as fast as his feet would carry him to the hospital wing, where Madam Pomfrey was waiting with Draco.  
~~**~~**~~  
  
He knew he was floating but all he could feel was the pain and the dew, after all, he was surrounded by fog. All he wanted to do was die. Somehow the fog and the pain were fading now but it was still great and he felt like there was nothing left to do. All the sounds around him were clearer. He couldn't go to sleep. This must mean it had to be another nightmare. So he tried to wake up but he knew he couldn't. Then as quickly as it had come the pain left and the fog faded. Then it was dark and he was sleeping. He felt himself drift off. He went into a dreamless sleep. A long, dreamless sleep.  
~~**~~**~~  
  
"Ron? Are you awake?" Ginny was standing nearest with her arms crossed and her face even more pale. And there was Harry again with his arms around her. Just supporting her. He couldn't seem to talk so he just gave them a confused look and turned his head away from them.   
Finally he got the strength to talk and turned back to face them. "What happened to me?" He asked still a little bewildered at the fact that Harry was hugging his younger sister. They couldn't be together, could they? I mean it wasn't fair that Harry always got what he wanted. The one thing that was guaranteed was no longer a reality. Hermione was going to be his, only his, and then it got taken away in a matter of seconds.   
"W-we're not sure yet. You b-bl-blanked out and y-you were in pain and you were bleeding. W-what...."Ginny seemed to get even greener in front of his eyes. He tried to sit up and see what was wrong with her because she had fallen onto the visitor's chair next to the bed, but the pain in his abdomen was too strong. He lied back down spasmodically and gritted his teeth.   
"Ginny? Are you ok?" Harry asked touching her forehead feeling for temperature. He put a finger under her chin and bowed his head. For a minute Ron thought they were going to kiss, but that's not what happened. He opened her eyelids wider. Her eyes were almost as crimson as the Gryffindor banner. Ginny just shook her head and stood up quietly and with the support of Harry lied down in the bed next to Ron's. "Do you want me to put you closer to Ron?" Ginny just silently nodded her head and Harry moved the bed closer to Ron's. "I'll go get Madam Pomfrey, ok?" She just nodded her head again and before he went into her office, he squeezed her hand and kissed her forehead.   
"Are you and Harry... um ... are you and Harry together?" Ron finally managed. Ginny gave him a timid grin and shook her head. "You're not?" She shook her head again. Then she turned the other way but had her hand outstretched so Ron would hold it. And hold it he did. He took her hand and noticed again how cold she was. He looked up at her and noticed that she was extremely pale with that greenish tint. She was also sweating. He could tell because of her shirt and her hair was almost completely damp at the roots.   
Madam Pomfrey came bustling in and immediately separated their hands. She didn't mind the beds being close but apparently they couldn't even touch each other.  
"Your sister could have a deadly disease, Mr. Weasley. We still haven't gotten her results from yesterday. Oh she should've just stayed in the hospital wing. She should've listened to me. She should've just rested. What if its fatal? What if its contagious? And then, what if you get it as well?" Ginny all the sudden became yellow, if that was possible from her greenness.   
"Sorry Madam Pomfrey." Ron just gulped and looked down at his stomach. "Harry? What is wrong with me?" He asked in a whisper, holding his stomach, as Madam Pomfrey closed the curtains around her and Ginny.   
"You were bleeding from a hole in your stomach and you started having convulsions. You should've seen Ginny, poor thing. She was already weak as it is. She tried to pick you up. And then when she couldn't, she started bawling. When Draco came in with Dumbledore– " Harry got a grave looking on his face suddenly, but he continued, "–and he took you away. She could not stand. I don't know what's wrong with her. I just hope she's o-okay." Harry turned away from Ron, but Ron could see Harry's cheeks turning pink. 'Why is Harry crying?' is all Ron could think about.  
"Harry? Do you like my sister or something?" Ron looked at Harry who's cheekbones visibly tightened. He didn't look at Ron and didn't make any movement. "Never mind, I shouldn't have asked. I just hope she's alright. Harry?" This time Harry put his head in his hands and wiped his face. He turned around to face Ron and for the first time Ron noticed Harry's chiseled face. So many scars, not just the lightning bolt but scars that were visible and some that weren't. Battle scars that weren't and that were more than skin deep. They were years of hurt and depression that Ron all the sudden understood. So mustering up the courage to do something he sat up despite the shooting pains. He held out his hand and Harry took it. They embraced for what seemed like forever until Ron let go and looked him in the eyes. "It's good to know that all I need in this world is great friends. I found one in you the day I sat down next to you on the Hogwart's Express in our first year and Harry, no matter what has happened, even this with Hermione, I would not take it back because at least I have you and at least I'm still alive." Ron couldn't believe what he just said so he continued, hugging him again, but this time not letting go. "You are my best friend and I thank God every day I have you. I'll always be there for you and I hope you do the same," he chuckled and looked into Harry's eyes and said, "We can be happy again, Harry. No matter what, we will be happy again. I promise. There is no need to mourn anymore." Harry started to cry but didn't hide it anymore.   
"Ron, she's gone and now Ginny might be gone too? What if she dies also? Ron, I don't think I would be able to handle it. You and Hermione and Ginny are my best friends and – and I don't think– I don't think I could take... Look, I don't think I could take losing any body else." Harry just broke down. Ron didn't do anything this time. He just stood there staring, because that was the best that he could do, there was no point in comforting him because he felt the same also he didn't think that Harry had ever cried in front of him until now and he wasn't about to let his friend's heart turn to stone.  
"Just cry it out. Just let it out Harry. Look, if there's anything you want to tell me, anything at all, just tel me now please. It doesn't matter what it is ok?"  
"Are you sure?" Harry asked wiping his tears and looking down at Ron's sheets as if there was something amazing about them. He looked up and Ron was smiling.   
"Yeah of course I'm sure Harry. It doesn't matter what it is. Even if its about Ginny."  
"Well actually it is. Well, when we were younger, I always looked at Ginny like your kid sister, someone that was nothing out of the ordinary except the diary thing. Yes, I liked Cho, but I only liked her. there was always something about the shyness of your sister that was mysterious to me. This occurred to me last year when she tried to protect me from Draco's dad. She magicked that mirror in front of me and the curse ricocheted off of him and he basically killed himself. I know that it took her saving my life to notice her but since then I haven't looked at her as your kid sister but as a girl. Just like it took you four years to notice Hermione, eh? Also I can't remember the countless times that we hung out together while you and Hermione were fighting about the next new thing... you know? I'm gonna miss all that. The four of us. But I think she loves me too is what I'm trying to say. I hope I get the nerve to tell her but for now I will take being friends. Plus, this whole Hermione thing, I think it would be a little too soon." Harry's face was flushed because he felt he had just rambled on. When he looked at Ron, he had tears in his eyes. "What's wrong? Did I do something wrong?"  
"No Harry. I'm gonna miss everything too. I'm just so happy that you finally told me is all." He lied back down and shut his eyes. He didn't let his flourescent orange eyelids bother his sleep. He fell asleep with a tear rolling down his cheek.  
~~**~~**~~  
  
August 30  
Two more days and I go to that wonderful school. I can't believe I'm a witch. I personally would prefer to be called a wizardess but, hey, what can you do??? So I guess my skepticism basically is over and done with. I can't wait. I'm going to try my hardest. I've read as much as I can and I can't wait to meet Harry Potter. It seems that he's my age which means that we will be in the same year. I can't believe that I'm gonna live in a castle. Maybe I will meet my prince there!! No, I know I won't meet any princes there. Especially not Prince William. That would be funny if he did go there though wouldn't it? Wow! But the castle I read was really beautiful. I just finished reading Hogwarts, A History, and I can't wait to see the ceiling and to make new friends. Wow, it just occurred to me, what if I became friends with Harry Potter? That would be so great. I know he would never pay attention to me though. I'm sure he'll hang out with the popular people since he is like the most famous person, like, EVER!! Well I better get going. I need to finish reading Standard Book of Spells, Grade 1. I can't believe it, even the title! Spells! I'm gonna learn magic and I'll be the best at it!  
Love,  
Hermione  
  
  
  
  
(A/N: R/R Please!!!! I really like this chapter so tell me what you think. Thanx! Thank you for all your reviews so far... you can give suggestions remember that! Ok well until next time!!) 


	5. There's Something Funny Brewing

Part V: There's Something Funny Brewing  
  
Harry couldn't quite put his finger on it. There was something strange going on and he wanted to find out what it was. Ron was acting kind of like, well, a girl. Draco was actually being nice, Ginny was feeling really down and sick all of the sudden. It just didn't make sense. Why would all these people's lives just take such an even greater and immense change unlike him who even though had dealt with death many times and took it harder with each one, did not feel the same way as his friends. In a way he felt very guilty by not doing what they did. But either way he was still confused. Not so much jealous but confused to their reactions which would be just the way Hermione would react to all of this. Draco and Ron were crying freely, which is both very unmanly like as they always claimed to be. He understood that they cried but so publicly and ferociously? They were being very sentimental for people that had always wanted to be the "real" men. He had let himself go but even Ginny seemed more fragile. He was in such deep thought that he didn't even see when Draco walked past him.   
"Hey Harry? What's the matter? You seem confused about something. Is there something I can help you with?" Draco asked, putting a hand on Harry's shoulder.  
"What? Why do you want to help?" Harry asked only getting his face more scrunched up in confusion.  
"Well, I mean I want to be a good friend. So I'm trying to help, if you'll let me. Will you let me be a good friend, Harry?" Draco said with tears in his eyes already.  
"Um, well yeah sure. I'm just a little off, I mean who hasn't been recently." Harry said quickly so as to not make Draco actually cry.  
"Thanks a lot Harry. I don't know what's come over me, actually. I just have this clarity now. Like a new life, like I've been reborn. I feel so free and I love it." Draco said wiping his eyes taking away the possibility of tears. "I just wish she was here to be with us."   
"Yeah, sure. Anything." Harry said touching his shoulder lightly and continuing on his way. For example now. What was this about? He had to find out.  
"I just wish she was here to be with us." Draco said as he watched Harry walk away.  
~~**~~**~~  
  
It was all around him now. Not just the blinding fog. He heard something far from off. Finally he could hear her voice. Well not her voice really, but what sounded like her muffled crying, saying the same thing over, only he couldn't understand what she was saying. Finally it became clear and he knew what it was and he emerged from the fog and he was in a restroom. Draco went into every stall and knew who he was looking for. He would look into a stall and then look at the one next to it and finally seeing her feet approached the stall with caution. His black shoes which usually squeaked didn't make a sound. Finally he just quickly swung the door open afraid to find something horrifying only to encounter Hermione at the age of thirteen. What she was saying was now completely clear to him and it wasn't all around him it was just coming out of her.  
Through tears she kept repeating the same thing, "A Mudblood? Why a Mudblood? What did I ever do to you Draco? What, what, WHAT???" That's all she was saying. But she ways saying it with such sadness. Sadness which he had never known her to have. Sadness which probably Harry and Ron didn't know about either. When he reached his hand to touch her and tell her that he DID care, the same blinding, moist fog enveloped him and floated him away only to bring him crashing down onto very solid ground. As he landed, the fog left again and he was standing in the Forbidden Forest. He started walking, first with a limp because the fall had hurt his knee and then a regular pace as the pain left his body. Towards the lake and found Hermione in a long, sheer, white robe walking along the shore. Looking almost heavenly. She didn't seem to notice him but he just wanted to watch her any way. He hid behind a big tree and just watched.   
She looked marvelous. Her hair was loose, curly as usual but not frizzy. It was just flowing. She had silver bangles on her small wrists and there were small white flowers in her hair as well. She was bare-footed but her toenails, even from afar, shimmered with a sliver nail polish just as her finger nails. Then she stopped and looked at the tree in which Draco was hiding behind. Draco knew she had spotted him but didn't dare look out again. Then as if in response to his hiding, he heard the most mysterious sound. It was mysterious and mystical. It was not just a sound it was voice. It was somebody singing but not quite. He couldn't explain it but it was like someone was reciting something. Like a poem. Just speaking but sounding as beautiful as a song. He tried to listen to the words and then understood what they said:  
  
I walked on the shore of the water's edge.  
The lake that contains my secrets.  
Inside it holds my deepest,  
and most darkest secret.  
Please find it.  
Then you will find me.  
I know that's what you want.  
I know that it's not just that but what I need.  
  
Just as Draco was about to peer and look to where Hermione might be, he got the scare of his life. Hermione was in front of him, looking as beautiful as ever. She had a smirk on her face. Then as he tried to look at her silver-polished fingernails. She wrapped her small and delicately, pale hand around her wand and pointed it at his arm   
In the same mysterious voice as before she said something so chilling, it sent a shiver down his spine and then his whole body as she put her frosty hand on his cheek, "Find me! If not you will have killed me. For good this time Draco, not just temporarily. But just to make sure you do I'll give you a message and a warning. Trust me when I say don't you DARE look in the lake, it's something else you have to think about. What could I be referring to then? And second, CRUCIO!!"  
And he woke up drenched in sweat, not aware of his yelling. He stopped yelling after he realized it was just a dream. He touched his arm which was aching with pain and still pounding to the rate of his fast-beating heart. He felt even more moister there and looked at his hand only to find that it was bleeding.   
~~**~~**~~  
  
"Madam Pomfrey, is it serious?" Dumbledore had summoned her up to her office after Draco had been run to the hospital wing by Harry after he found Draco bleeding at the entrance of the dungeons.   
"I cannot be sure. It seems to happen in their dreams. It's as if they're all being attacked where they can't be helped. I think Harry's next. Then who knows? It's all those who had a close relationship to her or a special place in her heart. The only thing is that before their nightmares happen, they start to act strangely."  
"Has Ginny had a dream as well?"  
"I'm not sure. Well, she's not sure. She keeps waking up in the middle of the night, crying and asking for something. I don't know what but then goes back to sleep. I tried to wake her up after one of those times to ask her, but she just turned over and said, 'Leave me alone, I need to study.' I thought that was a bit odd. In the morning I ask her if she slept well and she says no because her sleep had been dreamless, when in fact it wasn't. I am waiting for the day she remembers. So far, nothing."  
"That's quite strange. Quite strange indeed." Dumbledore scratched where his chin would be if it hadn't been covered by his large white beard. "I need to talk to Harry. Could you call him in here?" Madam Pomfrey nodded her head, stood up and headed for the door. When she reached the door and had her hand on the knob, Dumbledore spoke up again, "Oh yes. Madam Pomfrey? What mark was on Draco's arm?"  
She looked at him warily, sighed and noticed something in his eyes, ignored it and answered his question. "It was in the shape of an 'S'." She walked out and ran the rest of the way to the hospital wing.  
~~**~~**~~  
  
I walked on the shore of the water's edge.  
The lake that contains my secrets.  
Inside it holds my deepest,  
and most darkest secret.  
Please find it.  
Then you will find me.  
I know that's what you want.  
I know that it's not just that but what I need.  
  
It wasn't as vivid as when he first experienced but it was still clear in his mind. What did she mean 'lake' if she didn't mean the lake with the Merpeople in it? What in the world could she be talking about?   
This thought slipped away as Draco stared at Ginny who was laying next to him. She had a glow about her. She seemed very different. Maybe it was just that the room was dark and that the only window which let light in was on her. She seemed to have a very big difference, she seemed to have something similar about her. That something was the thing that he fantasized about every night. It was those shameful feelings he had had since the beginning of his first year and all the disgraceful things he had done because of those feelings towards the girl he once called a Dirty Mudblood. She looked just like Hermione. Then he noticed that her face began to shift its expression to that of confusion. That made him confused too. She started to perspire dramatically all at once.   
"No, please don't!" She whispered. This made Draco run to get some water in fear that she would wake up. " AAAAAAAAAAHHH!!" Ginny's scream cut through the night air. She awoke Ron. He sat up in bed only to fall back on the pillow and groan with the sudden pain which he still had on his abdomen. Draco came back and placed the water down on the table that held cards that read "Get Well!" and so on.   
"It's ok. Don't worry, I'm here." Draco said reaching towards her. He hugged her and kissed her forehead and kept rocking her back and forth. "What happened?" Ron was straining to get up and got a surprise when he saw a shadow move towards Draco.  
"Let her go. Let her rest." Harry broke the connection between Draco and Ginny and placed her head on the pillow gently. "Although she should speak let her lay back. It might help calm down." Ginny was shivering and her lip trembling. Her eyes welled up in tears and she closed them tightly.   
"It was Her-Hermione. She cursed me with– with Cruciatus and she said... AAAAHH!" It was a shorter and less tormenting yell than before but this time her eyes were filled with horror and not tears. She had held her hand on her collarbone and was now looking at it and losing the only color she had left. Her hand was the only thing with color. It was blood. She was staring at blood that was now coming out profusely from her chest.  
"Ginny? Oh my God, HARRY! You're the only one who can go get help! GO GET MADAM POMFREY!" Draco yelled.  
Harry ran for her and came back with her just in time. It seemed she had gone rigid and was foaming at the mouth. The blood still came from her collar bone. There was still the blood smeared on her hand. Harry began to cry. Madame Pomfrey checked her heartbeat first. Shooing away Draco, making him lie back down. Ron tried to get a glimpse and then that's when Ginny sat up and started coughing. The foam streamed down her chin and her throat. Now she was coughing and Madame Pomfrey patted her back. Ginny lied back once again and she let Madame Pomfrey clean her up. Then she began to cry and weep and sputter all at one time.  
"What's wrong with her?" Ron said in between coughs. Then Draco began to cough. The three of them did everything in unison all of the sudden. Then they all started to bleed with their cough. Madame Pomfrey just stared at them stunned. Harry's eyes widened as he kept stepping back afraid he might catch whatever is that they had. Then he realized that it wasn't that what she was afraid of. What he was afraid of was the fact that they all looked like Hermione in some sort of weird way. Even their hair was turning brown. Ginny's long and beautiful fiery red hair had brown streaks in it. He had thought the frizziness was because of her stress but he had seen her in battle and not even then did her hair get like that. Draco's hair also had new dark brown highlights in his platinum hair. What once looked like naturally gelled hair now looked like you could stick a needle in there and lose it. Ron's hair was almost completely brown and had grown. They all had bags under their eyes like she did when she would study for a long time which recently had been every day. They all looked at him and reached out but he was in some sort of trance. He seemed to keep stepping backwards forever until he hit the wall and the just bolted out of there with them reaching their arms out to him and yelling, "Harry! Harry! Help us!" at the same time.  
'Oh my God! What's going on here? Why are they all acting this way?' he thought while running towards Dumbledore's office. Before he knew it he crashed into him.  
"Harry what's wrong? What's on your shirt? Blood? Where did you get it?" he asked holding Harry's shirt and staring at the blood stains and then at him.   
"Ginny, Ron–I don't know–Draco too. They're all like one–the blood, it's from them. They're coughing their brains out. Almost literally." Dumbledore rushed past him and headed to the hospital wing. They traveled for what seemed like forever.   
When they finally got there, they were all subdued and sleeping. Madame Pomfrey wasn't around. Then they stepped into her office she was there sitting behind her desk. Her face was white and blotched with blood. There were also some blood spatters on her white part of her uniform. Her hands were trembling and her mouth was wide open as if she was looking at a ghost.   
"Madame Pomfrey?" Dumbledore asked. The glint in his eye had been missing from his eyes for days. It was like he had lost hope but hope in what he didn't quite understand. He spent most of the past four days in his study, usually with Mr. and Mrs. Granger. "Madame Pomfrey?" Dumbledore asked again. This time when she didn't answer he went by her side and shook her. Then he took his wand out and he said, "Ennervate." Not with his usual passion but with a monotone voice that Harry had never heard Dumbledore use. Madame Pomfrey came to but when she did she came weeping and crying out for help.  
"Prof–Prof- Professor Dumble–Dumbledore, s-sir. P-Please you h-have to h-help me. H-Her-Hermione —"  
"Shh, please, Madame Pomfrey calm down." She started to calm down. It took about five minutes but finally she was able to talk without stuttering.  
"What about Hermione?"Dumbledore proceeded.  
"The three of them were coughing and I couldn't do anything I just watched. I was numb. As soon as Harry left I came to and I was gonna go and get my wand to help them but then I noticed that there was a blue glow around them. But what was peculiar about it was that around that glow was another green one. They all had stopped coughing and had their eyes closed. Then they started saying, 'Crucio, Imperio, Crucio, Imperio, Crucio, Imperio,' over and over again and then they were lifted into the air and I couldn't move. I couldn't do anything. And just as fast, they landed back on their beds but this time a spirit rose out of them. It was three separate parts. It was Hermione but she wasn't a ghost– she wasn't even complete– because as soon as she landed on the ground she turned solid and came charging at me– and– and..." She broke back into tears. She couldn't even say 'and' any more. Dumbledore raised his wand again.   
"Madame Pomfrey, please. Don't make me use drastic measures. Please calm down." She stopped crying but remained trembling.  
"She came at me and she told me to tell you and Harry to look in the lake of her spirit or else she would die!" She let out a moan and held her stomach.   
"Professor Dumbledore, she isn't dead? Is it true?"  
"I knew that she couldn't be. No Harry, she isn't. Well haven't you noticed? She hasn't even began the process of being dead. She isn't even blue. She is just cold. We need to alert her parents. Please Harry if you could just give me a second here with Madame Pomfrey. You can go call Mr. and Mrs. Weasley and meet me in my office. We have a lot to discuss."  
~~**~~**~~  
  
2nd Year–   
June 3  
Well I don't know what to think. Ginny just went through the most horrible thing she could ever go through. She was the one who was doing all those awful things. But she couldn't help it. She was being controlled by the teenage version of Voldemort. Why is it that I can write it and not speak it? But any way. I felt so sorry for Ron when he found out. Harry didn't know but he came and talked to me after he had talked to him. He was crying and we hugged. I was so happy that we did and then I felt guilty because I was happy when he was angry. But he doesn't even know my feelings either, right? I shouldn't feel guilty. Well I better go to dinner although I don't think that I could eat today. Too much has happened.  
Love,  
Hermione  
  
(A/N: Well, that took a long time. Please R/R. I am not sure if this is a good chapter but hey! You never know. Tell me what you think. And please I am open to suggestions. OH and thank you Lady Norbert for your critique. I will keep that in mind. OH and tell me if I should add an entry at the end of every chapter or if two is enough. Thanx! Especially to all the 10 people who have reviewed!) 


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